Dear Diary,

It’s a funny thing having just had my last chemo dose. I’m joyous and really wanting to rejoin the living, but I’m also feeling the worst, physically. The last dose is the hardest, no question.

But now, for the last time, my weekly chemo face rash marked my cheek with a bright, white heart. Darling took my picture. Swollen face, almost no brows and lashes, and the redness. Of course. I look and feel so gorgeous. Ugh.

I was so hoping to get to writing yesterday. It didn’t happen. Plumbers: They Still Suck, the ongoing saga continues. I spent the best hours of my day working on double checking their paperwork. Absolutely necessary and absolutely sucked all my energy – such as it was.

Today is mostly about healing up from that and the very poor night of sleep I got. Woke up in a rage, pumping with adrenaline. Took me a couple of hours to calm down and get back to sleep. The past can sometimes creep in like that. I’m working on it.

But today I’ve made an important decision. I’m not heading north for my chemo rehabilitation. I want to go where it’s warm, so I’m instead returning to Freiburg. When I was there for my previous rehab after chemo and surgery, I was too weak to explore much of the area and when it was time to return home, I told myself I’d like to go back when I have more strength.

Well, I don’t have TONS more strength, but I am doing better than I was doing last time. So I’m returning to the clinic there, the good people who run it, and the lovely university town. I can hardly wait.

See you tomorrow,